Cloth Diapering - The Journey Begins

One thing I have learned while being pregnant is that people are suddenly interested in the most personal of decisions you make/will make concerning your pregnancy and subsequent child-rearing in ways it is inappropriate to be interested in other private matters. For instance, many women would not walk up to a new bride and ask if she intends to wear thongs or bikinis once she is married and then proceed to encourage/discourage her about her decision. Furthermore, would any woman dare to tell another how her future husband will respond to her choice in undergarments? I should hope not! However, once you announce your happy news, there is no shortage of people asking if you will be bottle or breast feeding, natural birthing or feeling no pain (more on that to come), working or staying at home with the baby, and of course using cloth or disposable diapers for your child. These questions are then followed by a conversation that usually involves a fair amount of this is how it will be and judging coming from the other party and of course how your baby daddy will respond to the decision that, I can only guess, they think he is completely unaware of.

Today I will discuss one subject in particular, the cloth versus disposable conversation is one that I have been avoiding since the time I knew I was pregnant due to some very negative responses I received when telling people of my thoughts. Now I will share the whole story in efforts to continue to avoid having the conversation repeatedly for the next three months. Terry and I have been considering cloth diapering our children for about 4 years now. (For the record, Terry and I were only "trying" to get pregnant for one month so this is to let you know the decision was not made lightly or on a whim.) When we knew a child was on the horizon, we made the decision final - we will do everything within our power to diaper our new baby with cloth diapers. For those of you who are environmentally conscious and are commending us at this moment, I must admit - this decision was not about the environment. Sure the environmental factors are compelling - but the cost factor is overwhelming! Diapers are not cheap! In fact almost every cloth diaper conversation I have had thus far begins with a well-meaning person telling me how it is going to cost so much to diaper that little blessing once she enters the world and begins to do the doo (so to speak). I then tell them, "Actually, we are going to try to use cloth diapers." This is where I get the fun response. Sometimes they are polite - but it is unlikely.

At this point I don't believe people realize how offensive their comments can be. I realize I am a bit more emotional and fragile in my pregnant state, and others should realize that too. The nicest of people might say, "It is a noble effort, but I don't think you realize how much work it is." Most people will physically recoil at the thought and lash out as if I have offended them for using disposable diapers. Let me make one thing very clear right now, I DO NOT CARE IF YOU USED DISPOSABLE DIAPERS ON YOUR CHILD. I don't even care if you use disposable diapers on your NEXT child. I will not try to convince you that cloth is better than disposables for YOU. It might surprise you to know, we weren't even thinking of you or your child when we made this decision. So let me ask you - Why are you taking this personally?? Why do you care how much laundry Terry and I have to do? Why do you care so deeply about such a personal decision in which you have NO SAY and doesn't affect you at all?! It just blows my mind!

In an effort to keep my blood pressure at normal levels, I will move on to my next point. I may be a naive first time mother, but I am smart enough to know that well-meaning and well-informed are not synonyms. If you do not know what an "all-in-one" or "fitted" diaper is, then you should not be telling me how cloth diapering will be. If you have not been researching cloth diapers for the past four years, and don't know what dsq stands for or have never heard of a snappi then you are behind the times my friend and your perception of cloth diapering is far from reality. For some ideas about what a modern day cloth diaper looks like check this out:

Some places of interest to get more information:
http://www.cottonbabies.com
http://www.softclothbunz.com/
And many others if you do a google search for cloth diapers.
A local seller:
http://babysewcute.synthasite.com/index.php

So please educate yourself on the subject and then we can talk diapers if you so choose. I won't bring it up again. As I mentioned before, this is primarily a budget decision. If someone feels so strongly about Terry and I using disposables, you are more than welcome to purchase all the diapers you want and deliver them to our house. We will probably use them. Thank you to anyone who has bought or will buy us diapers - again we will probably use them.

In closing, this is a decision Terry and I have made together considering our own sensibilities and needs as a family. Although we appreciate your concern for our well being and that of our child, I assure you using cloth diapers does not constitute child abuse. It is highly unlikely you will ever change one of our child's diapers and I know you will never wash one so it really won't bother you later - I promise! I would also like to thank those people who have been supportive of our decision. My parents were the first we told and they responded quite favorably. I also have certain friends, Eden, Heather, and Jamie who have been incredibly supportive as well. Those are just a few of the early supporters there are others I haven't mentioned - thanks to you as well. I am certain we will have no shortage of funny cloth diaper stories to tell when Bella arrives and this great adventure begins, but we can hope we won't be telling horror stories about how I had to get a second job to pay for all the diapers.